Florida’s legislative session this year was one for the record books. The House, led by Miami Republican wonder boy Marco Rubio, devolved into deadlock and strife, including an all-nighter on the eve of Passover weekend. The Senate mired down over such important legislation as the outlawing of “truck nutz.” Meanwhile, neither produced real progress on insurance reform but did pass a budget that cut out kids, oldsters, the sick, the dying, the handicapped, the college-bound, and most folks in between.
It got so bad that, after not getting their way over slots gaming, a few South Florida legislators suggested the region take its tax money and set up its own state. The line, they said, would be drawn just north of the Broward County, which if you’re not familiar, is where Fort Lauderdale is.
North Florida, which would retain both the Gators and the Seminoles, was fine with South Florida going away.
If this had been done earlier, the good people of North Florida wouldn’t have had to suffer through eight years of Gov. Jeb Bush, a Miami resident.
We also wouldn’t have had to put up with the damage done to North Florida by House Speaker Marco Rubio, another Miami resident.
And think about it. Where do hurricanes strike most often?
That’s right. South Florida.
If North Florida became a separate state, maybe we wouldn’t have to subsidize rebuilding oceanfront mansions in South Florida and our property insurance rates would go down.
Hanging chads? Another state’s problem.
Yes, sir, this idea has real appeal.
The problem is that no one wants Central Florida, with its uncontrolled growth and traffic gridlock. Northeast Florida is now fighting efforts by Orlando to siphon water from the St. Johns River, a move which would dry up tributaries and wetlands across the region just to water Central Florida lawns and keep Lake Buena Vista blue for the tourists. Those fighting the water grab have nicknamed it, “The Big Suck.” Who wants to be on that team?
If South Florida won’t take Central Florida and Walt Disney World, perhaps it would be better to divide Florida into three states – North Florida, Central Florida and South Florida.
With that, Rubio could be governor of South Florida, Charlie Crist could be governor of Central Florida and we could elect someone with sense to be governor of North Florida.
That would be a refreshing change.
Buck and I could no longer commiserate about our shared state’s Democratic party, but we could compare notes on the two new states’ organizations, which are bound to be just as disappointing.
We’ll keep you posted on whether Florida joins the Dakotas and the Carolinas in civic divorce.
- Topic: News & Comment
I noticed you completely failed to mention that Miami-Dade and Broward County, in particular, contribute a lot more in tax revenue to the State’s coffers than we get back. This is an ongoing problem that can only be resolved with Statehood for South Florida. South Floridians are tired of funding the rest of the State’s programs while we continually get the short end of the stick. Additionally, South Floridians and North Floridians don’t even share the same values. We’re tired of North Florida Conservatives telling us what to do. It’s time for a clean break.
I hope you all have better luck than the California secessionist movement, which has been debating splitting the state north and south since before statehood in 1850. We’re mostly liberals in both regions, so the split is cultural, not political. The eco-friendly, tie-dyed granola munchers up north want to secede from the hedonistic, narcissistic water-wasters down here.
There’s more us than there are of them, and it’s just not a big issue in Southern California, so when the secession movement bestirs itself every five years or so, it always fails in the south.
The one thing everybody seems to agree that the dividing line would be north of San Luis Obispo.
Another sticking point: The state initials N.C. and S.C. are taken.
Jon, how about “Upper California” and “Lower California?” It’s better than “Superior California” and “Inferior California,” for sure.
And Proud Miamian, I do realize you guys are really proud of your tax contributions: “…a few South Florida legislators suggested the region take its tax money and set up its own state.”
One of my questions is what wuld happen to the thousands that need medical care (ie hiv/aids diabetes) they would take all the money away just so they could get along and fuel there own needs
“Proud Miamian?” I’ve never heard of that. Pissed-Off Miamian, Tired Miamian, Cynical Miamian, Bigoted Miamian, Drive-Like-A-Maniac Miamian and Stoopid Miamian — those I’m familiar with.
Trish – Unfortunately, Upper California and Lower California are already taken too — sort of. Before the U.S. “acquired” what is now the state of California, it was the Mexican territory of Alta (or, for non-Spanish-speakers, “Upper”) California. The southern territorial border of Alta California was approximately where the state and international borders are now.
The Mexican state below is still called Baja (”Lower”) California. (Their license plates are marked “B.C.”) I think that if secession ever succeeds, the new state should take an entirely new name. My suggestion for the former northern Californios is “Eureka,” which is the state motto, and means, “I found it!”
Proud Miamian: Just so you’re clear: Buck is a proud Coconut Grovian.
The only reason I don’t support everything from Lake Okeechobee to Key West becoming an independent state is because of Bright Futures. I’m not gonna pay out of state fees to go to UF. Give South Florida a good, public university, and once the government finally cuts Bright Futures [bound to happen], I’ll have no problem with being part of the 51st state. Granted this will take decades if not longer, but I support it.