The future Mrs. Charlie Crist

Pull out your wallets, kids, and prepare to wager. We’ll need two separate pools. One is for the person who most closely predicts how soon Charlie Crist, 51 and gay, will call off his engagement to Carole Rome, 38 and not quite divorced yet, if John McCain doesn’t pick him as his running mate. The other is for how long the marriage will last if McCain does pick him, or alternatively, if Charlie goes through with it just to prove he’s not gay. Which he is. Gay.

But first, let’s enjoy Charile’s newfound bliss vicariously, by reading how his engagement came to be.

Crist, 51, asked Carole Rome to marry him Thursday morning at his St. Petersburg apartment, giving her a blue sapphire ring surrounded by diamonds. She immediately said yes.

“I’m very happy and couldn’t be more pleased. What a great way to celebrate America’s birthday,” said Crist, who has been mentioned as a potential running mate for Republican presidential candidate John McCain. “We’ve been talking about it for quite a while. I asked her while we were looking out over Tampa Bay and I couldn’t think of a better place to do it.”

O.K., how many men not in the closet say they “couldn’t be more pleased” that the woman they passionately love accepted their proposal? And how many describe the experience as “a great way to celebrate America’s birthday?” That would be…let’s see…rounding off to the next decimal point…carrying the one…adjusting for the Eastern time zone…yeah, zero.

But maybe Charlie was flummoxed by the scope of it all.

Asked what made him fall in love, Crist said, “Her beautiful smile, her sweetness, her brilliance — all of it.”

“All of it?” “It?” Did he really just say, “all of it?” Why not, “Et cetera, et cetera. I am the king?”

Charlie is blaming his years of bachelorhood on the bad experience he had when he attempted heterosexual marriage in his youth. That time, the union lasted days.

“It made me be very selective, candidly. Those things tend to make you gun-shy a little bit, but I’m so blessed to have found such a wonderful woman,” Crist said. “It sure is great to find the right one…

“It will be awfully nice to have her at the mansion. It’s a big place to have to be alone in,” he said.

Yeah, once she moves in they can watch movies together and try each other’s sun screens (hope hers is better than his), and swap Lean Cuisines and stuff. Fun! But here’s the kicker.

Rome was previously married to Blue Star Jets president Todd Rome. She has two daughters, aged 9 and 11, but Crist said he hopes the couple has a child of their own someday.

She’s 38, Charlie. Someday better be real soon or you might have to use third-party assists like artificial insemination. Whoops, my bad.