Archive: Poetic Justice
Newt Tweets Twaddle

Newt Gingrich was up in arms over “courtesy.”
He says bombing ISIS with courtesy’s heresy.
But CNN got it wrong,
And Newt’s tweet was a bomb.
So sheepishly, he tweeted a retraction, for accuracy.

An Imbiber’s Self-Interest

They’re off to the polls — all kilted and frisky,
Though many think Scottish independence is risky.
David Cameron’s sweating it,
The bookies are betting it,
But I worry what it means for the price of scotch whiskey.

Better Terror Fodder

ISIS has pledged to never stop until the U.S. yields.
It plans to turn our country into a new battlefield.
If we see that aggression,
May we make a suggestion?
Let’s use Lindsey Graham and John McCain as human shields.

A Foolish Consistency

On the issue of gay marriage Pam Bondi sometimes varies.
O’er Floridian thresholds gay brides can’t be carried.
But if wed somewhere else
And you want a divorce,
Not in Florida, where you must stay unhappily gay married.

Study in Stupidity

In middle school no assignment is fitter
Than the study of historical figures.
But in D.C. they’ve assigned
Seventh graders to find
Comparisons between George W. Bush and Hitler!

Beware of CongressCare

We’re watching the ebola epidemic,
To which Congress’ response is anemic.
Oh, they’ll toss a few million
To save a few children,
Long as it’s mostly just Africans getting sick.

Will — He Shills!

It’s true the right-wing apologist George Will
Often is scheduled on wingnut speaking bills.
But he’s not a journalist,
He’s special — he’s a columnist.
Which allows him to shill for the Koch brothers at will.

Need Compass Comrade?

I’d fire the lot of ‘em if I were their boss,
But maybe the Russian border is more confusing than most.
Why else would Putin explain
The incursion in Ukraine,
By saying, “A thousand Russian troops and tanks kind of … got lost.”

Executive Action Figure

President Obama has returned from vacation,
Recharged and ready to lead this great nation.
Though with a do-nothing Congress,
He doesn’t have much choice,
But to instigate some serious executive action.

Serial Power Abuser

Rick Perry left the courthouse grinning and defiant,
Leaving behind a his mugshot and set of fingerprints.
If he abused his power
While serving as Texas governor,
Just think of the powers he could abuse as president.