Archive: Poetic Justice
Need Compass Comrade?

I’d fire the lot of ‘em if I were their boss,
But maybe the Russian border is more confusing than most.
Why else would Putin explain
The incursion in Ukraine,
By saying, “A thousand Russian troops and tanks kind of … got lost.”

Executive Action Figure

President Obama has returned from vacation,
Recharged and ready to lead this great nation.
Though with a do-nothing Congress,
He doesn’t have much choice,
But to instigate some serious executive action.

Serial Power Abuser

Rick Perry left the courthouse grinning and defiant,
Leaving behind a his mugshot and set of fingerprints.
If he abused his power
While serving as Texas governor,
Just think of the powers he could abuse as president.

Army of Robocops

A growing trend that should make us all wary
Is their change from mildly threatening to really scary.
Ferguson just proves it —
If they own it, they’ll shoot it,
As cops become less like police and more like the military.

Finally, Leaker Leaves!

He’s been couch-surfing there for two years,
Haunted by paranoia and extradition fears.
It’s probably been borin’
But according to the Ecuadorans,
When Julian Assange leaves, they’ll shed no tears.

Seeking Political Cover

Some say her political instincts are superior,
But she shouldn’t have called Obama’s foreign policy inferior.
She said she was sorry,
And even hugged him at a party,
But Karl Rove says Hillary was just “covering her political posterior.”

Sorrier Than Sorry

If Fox News Hasn’t offended you lately, don’t worry,
It’ll soon find the low point in the cable-news slurry.
Smith called Robin a coward
To help fill the news hour,
And as Shep himself said, he “couldn’t be more sorry.”

Invade, Leave, Repeat

We got out, but now we’ve got to go back,
‘Cause their soldiers just don’t have the knack.
At the sight of a gun
They turn tail and run,
So we’re back — on the attack — in Iraq.

It’s Unreality TV!

Remember when she was armed, dangerous, in flannel?
Well now she’s assumed the news reporter’s mantel.
So we can be perpetually annoyed
By someone who’s actually unemployed.
Just tune in to the new Sarah Palin Channel.

Jose Don’t Surf

Get Rick Perry out from behind a teleprompter,
And he’s more like butcher, less like a doctor.
When it comes to immigration,
Just pass him some ammunition.
He’s shooting little wetbacks from a helicopter.