Tag Archives: Stephen Colbert

Verbatim

Colbert: Cuomo’s Comment ‘the Dumbest Thing’ He Could Say

“That is the dumbest thing you could say as a politician. That’s like closing your speech with, ‘Apple pie sucks, I’m lukewarm on the troops, and those stripes make the American flag look fat! Thank you, I hate my mother!’”

— Stephen Colbert, slamming New York Gov. Andrew Cuomo (D) for saying America “was never that great” this week, declaring on the CBS Late Show that the line was “the dumbest thing you could say as a politician.”

News & Comment

Play ‘Republican National Convention Bingo’

Courtesy of Stephen Colbert and the “Late Show” there is a way for disgruntled Republicans to have fun during the Trump-vention.

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Verbatim

Colbert Says Trump Does a Better ‘Colbert’ than Colbert

He’s completely playing on an emotional level – and so beautifully. I mean, it’s one of the reasons why I just can’t do that old character anymore, because he’s doing it better than I ever could, because he’s willing to drink his own Kool Aid and manufacture and distribute it, because he’s got all the cash. … I’m not the first person to say this, but I completely agree that he’s my old character with $10 billion.

— Stephen Colbert, saying Donald Trump is playing his old character better than he ever could, The Hill reports.

News & Comment

Obama Hijacks the Show but Colbert Report Pulls No Punches

If you missed it, watch the revamped segment Colbert calls, “The Word,” but which Obama called, “The Decree.” The president out-deadpans the deadpanner himself.

News & Comment

Colbert Analyzes Krauthammer’s ‘Layman’s’ Psychiatric Evaulation of the President

Verbatim

Colbert: Obama Stole Immigration Idea from GOP

He stole that idea from the Republicans. They’ve had the idea of putting off doing something about immigration reform for over a decade.

Stephen Colbert, expressing mock anger over President Obama’s delay on immigration reform.

Verbatim

Take a Break, Republicans

Tonight the Republican candidates had their second presidential debate in less than a week, and I was excited as a kid in a candy store who spent three hours in that same candy store last Wednesday.

Stephen Colbert, commenting on yet another Republican debate during his show, The Colbert Report

Camera

Clarence Thomas is One of the Gifts George H.W. Bush Just Keeps on Giving

News & Comment

Rally to Restore Sanity/Fear Live

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Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert’s Rally to Restore Sanity and/or Fear is set to live stream at noon on Saturday, Oct. 30. If you don’t have a TV (I feel ya, I don’t either) don’t despair. Just go to the Daily Show’s site and viola!

And speaking of spreading insanity and fear, if you’re up for multitasking while you watch I have an assignment for you. Send an email to David Ford, spokesperson for ABC News. Ford is the guy who’s being quoted justifying the network’s plan to include discredited blogger Andrew Breitbart in their election night coverage.

Asked about Breitbart’s history of unethical behavior and misinformation, ABC News’ David Ford told Media Matters: “He will be one of many voices on our air, including Bill Adair of Politifact. If Andrew Breitbart says something that is incorrect, we have other voices to call him on it.”

It’s not a matter of if Breitbart will say something incorrect, so for ABC to hide behind the fair and balanced trope by including people who don’t plan elaborate media lies isn’t exactly the same thing as providing the best reporting available.

Here’s what Ford lists as his email address on LinkedIn:

Update: Apparently there was an outpouring of criticism. Media Matters reports that the Breitbart has been shunted onto ABC’s online coverage on election night:

read more »

News & Comment

Sanity and Fear Will Collide in Washington Events

RallySanityWatchers of the Daily Show and the Colbert Report know about the “competing” rallies planned in Washington on Halloween weekend, a couple of days before the midterm elections. Jon Stewart’s Rally to Restore Sanity seems to be beating out Stephen Colbert’s March to Keep Fear Alive in the Facebook fans department.

On the Rally to Restore Sanity Facebook page, there is an open challenge to come up with 25 things that would not help restore sanity at the event. Among the suggestions:

  • Talking about the miracle of the size of the crowd
  • Wearing a McCain/Palin 2008 campaign button
  • Wearing the American flag as an article of clothing or an accessory
  • Bringing small rugs, turning toward FOX “News” and praying six times during the rally
  • Safety pinning copies of our birth certificates to our chests
  • Starting a movement to change the National Anthem to “The Thong Song” because “The Star Spangled Banner” is anti-colonialist
  • Inviting a local coven to provide insight on the Delaware Senate race
  • Have speeches fact-checked by Andrew Breitbart

There’s also a call for slogans for hand-painted signs but so far, the results are more earnest than funny. Among the better submissions are, “FOX–the only network where you are dumber after you watch it,” and “Sarah Palin is proof you’ll never go poor appealing to the lowest common denominator.”

Can you do better? Share your suggestion for either category in the comments.